We only have today, CaiCai

Dear Cailen,

Right now, everytime you hear music you unabashadly bop up and down and break into sweet, joyful dance, and I watch you, so happy and free, and think there will be a day when you won't do that anymore because it won't be cool. Or manly.

But I hope there will still be that young, free, uninhibited Cailen somewhere in your soul, bopping, swaying, lifting your arms up to that beat....

Right now, you wake up at 5 AM because you hear daddy, and I know you want to see him because it could be your only chance that whole day. And you watch his every move as he eats breakfast. And gets his coat and keys. And right now you cry and say "no, no, no" as he heads to the door. Even after he hugs and kisses you a hundred times.

I hope someday you understand that daddy does this every morning for you.

Right now you cry for mommy to stop and hold you as she rushes every morning to get you and herself out the door.

So she can drop you off somewhere else for the whole day.

So she can pick you up at the end of the day so she can have just enough time to get you ready for bed and maybe play for a little bit.

I hope someday you know how this is all for you. So you can have a room, a home. a comfortable life.

Someday, being with mommy and daddy won't be the most important thing to you anymore.

And that may be a time when we finally have enough time to spend with you.

We only have this moment together now, baby bear.

...And not a second goes by where I'm not aware of that...